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Fuck Marry Kill: Barbie Doll Edition

Barbie, Ken and Skipper

We know Barbie isn’t a sex doll

But we are incredibly surprised that there isn’t a Barbie sex doll. Full Disclosure: We have not done any research on the matter and there very well could be a Barbie sex doll. Actually, if any of today’s choices were turned into a sex doll, our money is on Ken. For some reason we think that is way more likely.

Look, I don’t know why you got us all hung up on sex dolls. That’s not what this is all about. STOP DISTRACTING US! There’s a lot more to this episode than that. I mean, we also feature Barbie’s little sister, Skipper. But don’t worry. She’s not too little. She was made in 1964, and that makes her…54 years old. So all of this is on the up and up.

We know that everyone here has at one point fantasized about Barbie and Ken (and yes, even Skipper), so we’re not going to waste any more of your time and get straight to what you came here for.

You’re choices for today are:

The Grooviest Toy Around: Ken
The ‘Ok, I was wrong, maybe she wasn’t a pilot. But she is a Flight Attendant‘ one: Barbie
And uhh,… Homecoming Queen, I guess?: Skipper

So there you go. Make your picks and let us know what you think

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